part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7.

6.5 was written after 7, but chronologically mostly takes place between 6 and 7 (and between 5 and 7, for that matter, as 6 is a super-prequel which takes place before even part 1).

The girl I like, when she said she was going to give her boyfriend another chance, that's what made me puke. The day before, she had told me that it was completely over between them. Then, the following day, she calls me at work, and we discreetly chat about her situation with her boyfriend. As soon as she said she was going to forgive him, my breathing became irregular and ragged. I quietly got up from my desk, when to the bathroom, and started vomiting. She didn't want to hear this, so we hung up then.

The next day, she sends him an MSN reading "just start getting used to idea that i am never comign back to arizona and you are never coming back to montreal so stayo n 4chan stock up on your porn and your dating sim games and reignite your past realtionships with loneoly emo girls".

The day after that, her MSN name is "happy two-year anniversary, baby <3".

So I'm a bit confused these days.

The way I've presented her on this blog so far, she might seem like a total bitch. But I've only presented the parts that have got me thinking about suicide. All the "good" parts, the happy moments where we really enjoy each other's company, etc., exist, but are not relevant to my suicide.

Omake:

I saw a girl who looked like 4ou, a girlfriend from before Meiko and after Katheryn (whom I use as a reference point not because they are my "favorite" or anything like that, but they are ones I know I've blogged about). She was with a guy, possibly her boyfriend. I looked at her, but didn't stop her, and she kept walking by, and then I kept walking. But after 1 block, I decided since I was going to die soon anyway, I might as well take a chance, so I turned around and chased after her for 3 blocks. So I asked her if she was Catherine, and she said no. I believed her, 'cause her voice sounded different. Although her facial expression and everything seemed the same. Like the "embarassed why is this guy bothering me" expression.