Yesterday, there was a promotion called "Bring me a DIM bra" where if you brought a DIM bra to a "spotter" outside The Bay on St. Catherine street (that's for Montreal, in Toronto and Ottawa it was different addresses) between 12:00PM and 4:00PM, they give you an iPod shuffle.

So I show up at The Bay at around 10:00AM to buy a DIM bra, and I found some for $17, which is a pretty good deal for an iPod shuffle (no idea if that's a good deal for a bra or not). I head back down and look around to see if there's anyone setting up a booth or something, but I don't see anything, so I head over to the arcade to goof off a bit.

At 11:30, I head back to The Bay and there's a lineup for it. They've only got 120 iPods to give out (from the rules description), and there's already more than 120 people standing in line there. The first thing that goes through my mind is "who the hell organized the line?" 'Cause I don't see any "DIM" representatives here, and it's not like there's a cord fence thing to establish a line. I'm with Mei, so I tell her to wait at the end of the line while I go around inquiring about stuff. I go into The Bay asking people behind counters about "this iPod promotion thing" and none of them seem to know anything about it. There isn't a dedicated "DIM" booth in The Bay that I can go to, so I have to ask random employees. No luck.

While I was walking around outside, I saw a guy I had seen before at McGill, and he was like near the front of the line (no more than 20 people before him). I bite my lips and gather up the courage to perform a Charisma check. I open with "[Bluff] Hey, what's up?" to which he responds with a noncommital "Hey..." I ask "[Persuade] So, you still going to McGill?" which improves the conversation mood a lot, because now he knows I'm not a random solicitor "[Success] I'm graduating! Well... I'm graduating this semester, anyway... What about you?" I say "Yeah, I graduated too." So we start talking about my situation, of how I graduated on an odd semester, so I have to wait until the even semester to get my diploma, and how I don't have a job yet, etc. This guy, I've seen him with a friend of mine named "Huan", so to further cement the bond between us, I ask "Hey, have you seen Huan lately?" And he says "You know what? No, I haven't!" So I interject in, all excited "Yeah, she's disappeared, hasn't she?" and the energy is contageous, and he start laughing and joking about Huan. Now I move in for the kill. I lean in close to him, so the person behind him can't hear, and say "Hey, you mind if I like... stand behind you?" And he says "No, no, go ahead!" so I do so. Did I mention I made record-breaking sales as a telemarketer?

I wait a bit, for the person behind me to "forget" about this intrusion, and then whip out my cell phone to call Mei to let her know to come join me here at the front of the line (we each have a bra, and I was hoping to get 2 iPods). I wanted to make it sound like I wasn't just bringing in my friend from the back of the line though. Rather, I wanted to make it sound like we were supposed to meet up here, but Mei just hadn't shown up yet. So I open with "Hey Mei, I'm at The Bay. You coming down here soon?" I expected her to be confused, and she was. She said "What?" I continued "Yeah, I'm at the front of the bay, kind of near the front." She didn't catch on right away. "The front of the bay. There's a line up. I'm sort of near the front." She asked me what the hell I was talking about. I was getting frustrated. "The bay! I'm there, at the front of it! Come meet me!" She asked me if she should drop her place in line. "Yes." Still she protested. "Trust me!" I forced under my breath. Finally, she said she would, so I closed with "Okay, see you soon."

I was just about to introduce Mei to the McGill guy and then have her hold this spot in the line and go look around some more, when someone walked around the corner holding a "DIM" sign. And people started storming for it, and I heard someone shout "Run, Melissa! Run!" or something like that, and I'm thinking oh shit... The crowd forms a semicircle around the DIM representatives and people are getting pissed. Some guy says "I was here since 10:30, and if that fucker just came 5 minutes ago. If he gets an iPod and I don't, I'm gonna beat the shit out of him and take it from him." and the middle-aged woman in front of him, rather than getting scared or something, laughs and says she'll help. The security guards make a mild effort to establish a line (basically by saying "You have to form a line", but nobody wants to stand behind the person they're currently standing next to, so no line forms), and over time they start announcing they only have 20, then 10, then 5 ipods left. It's pretty much hopeless for me, but Mei Mei might still get one. Plus, if for some reason, someone gets pulled out of the line or whatever, I might get one too. As the quantities run low, some guy, knowing it's a lost cause for him, leaves the pseudo-line and heads towards the front, and starts picking on this other guy. "Hey man, why'd you cut in there?" No responce, so he keeps pushing "I just wanna talk man. I saw you back there. You were behind my daughter. Why are you up here now?" The guy responds with "Listen man, ..." and then says something that I can't quite make out. The conversation gets more and more aggressive, with the not-in-the-line guy saying "I'm gonna wait for you right over there." At one point, he reaches over and grab the in-line guy's shoulder, and the guards actually have to intervene (for the only time that day) and break up all physical contact. In the end, I didn't get one, and if they had had 2 more iPods, Mei would have gotten one (the cut off was the guy in front of Mei).

After lots of "unfairness" complaints, the DIM representatives point out that there's nothing on the website saying anything about lining up, and that they could have just given iPods out randomly if they wanted to, but I think that's not a very fair argument because the security guards were yelling at us to form a line (even if we weren't actually doing so).

So we go to return Mei's bra. On my receipt, there's a stamp that says for hygenic reasons, I can't return bras, but for whatever reason, Mei's receipt doesn't have that stamp. We go to the customer service thing on the first floor, and just as Mei is lifting up her bag and saying she wants to return this, the woman behind the counter says we have to return it on the floor on which it was purchased (the 3rd floor in this case). Mei didn't hear or something, so she says "What?" and the woman repeats it, and hands her a $10 rebate card, explaining that if she buys something, this card will give her $10. I lean in closer, 'cause she has sort of a French accent and I'm the type of person who always pays attention to the terms of the deal (which is why I'm not that bitter about not getting an iPod; I took a risk, and lost it, but I think it was worth spending $17 for the chance to get an iPod shuffle) and then she asks me "Are you returning something too?" and hands me a $10 card before I can answer. I don't get her explanation of this card, so I ask "You have to buy something to get the $10?" and she says yes. I'm thinking this is a worthless piece of shit, 'cause I probably have to buy like $500 worth of items and then I'll get $10 cash back, but as we ride the escalators to the 3rd floor, and I read the back of the card, it looks like this is just a gift certificates card worth $10, though its expiry date is set for today.

While we're at the counter, returning Mei's bra, she talks about how she was surprised my friend (the McGill guy) was able to sneak his way to the front to get an iPod ('cause when we were in the semi circle, he was actually behind both of us), and wondered why no one got pissed at him. I told her "Nobody notices him because he's black." Immediately after I said this, I realized that the woman behind the counter processing the refund, only like 12 inches away from me, is black. I feel deeply embarassed, but she doesn't seem to react. Maybe she wasn't paying attention.

After returning Mei's bra, we decide to go up to the electronics section to see what we can buy for $10 ('cause Mei figures we can't combine our card to get something for $20). On the way up, I explain to Mei about me being embarassed about the "black" thing, and the fact that that didn't occur to her (and the fact that I made that social blunder in the first place) just further proves my point that seriously, nobody notices black people. I think all the crowd say was some black guy, and there was no way for them to know if that was the same black guy who, just moments ago, was further back in the line. All black people look the same to them.

We look around the electronics department for a bit, and play with the idea of buying a PSP, but really $10 off is not such a great deal for how much cash I'm gonna have to plunk down. I really wanted to just buy somethind under $10, so I'd get it for free, rather than buying something I don't really want all that much just because "it's on sale". Everything else is too expensive or I could get for free on the Internet anyway, so I go to the kid's department and buy two cases of gummi bears for $9.75. At first, the lady says I can't buy this, but after some talking, I figure out what she really means is that she can't give me the change for the item in cash, so I tell her I'll just throw away the remaining quarter. She charges it up, and then she tells me actually that I still get the 25 cents left on my card, so I thank her, and take all my stuff and go.

Mei was considering buying chocolate, but on the end, decided to buy pantyhose. When we got to the counter, I gave my card as well and we asked if we could, you know, "combine" these two cards together (to save $10.25 instead of merely $10). The clerk not only says yes, but then gives Meiko the change to her purchase in cash: 97 cents.

So overall, we spent $17 (Mei got her bra refunded), and we got about 9 bucks worth of pantyhoses, a bra, and some candy, and the potential to win an iPod (though that potential has now reached zero). Not great, but not a disaster either.

The bra is a 32D (Using the UK/CAN/US system). If you're a girl and this fits you, I want to meet you. Erm... merely to give you a free bra, of course. If you're a guy and this fits you, don't bother contacting me.